Tuesday 25 December 2007

Comparing and How It Disempowers Us

You've probably, at some point in your life, compared yourself with others and ended up feeling inferior or inadequate.

Maybe you envied someone for his looks, his social skills, his position, his talents, his popularity, his car, his fame, or his body. Most of us do this without really thinking about what we're doing, but think about how often you do it.

Consistently comparing ourselves with others is very disempowering and can erode our confidence and self-worth. This stops us from achieving all that we're capable of in life.

This is how comparing ourselves with others can hurt us:

Firstly, when we compare ourselves with someone and it makes us feel inferior, we may feel that we should be achieving the same results. Now this sounds like a positive thing - if envy can drive us to fulfill the same goals, then why not?

Well, envy and inferiority are such powerful emotions that it can make us feel as though besides our goal, everything else is unimportant, even our loved ones, or values like honesty and integrity, even human life. Dictators and other power-hungry individuals have often been driven by envy and self-loathing to reach the pinnacle of power by all means necessary.

Envy and inferiority also cause us to blindly pursue aims that in the end, we may find we really didn't want in the first place. Our focus had been on other people's goals, what they'd wanted, what they'd achieved. Lost in a cloud of envy, we failed to think about our own aspirations.

Think about the people you might be envying - that millionaire entrepreneur, that influential politician, that top housing agent, that up-and-coming actor, that hot young athlete. Deep down inside, is that what you really want to be? Would you be willing to sacrifice your own passions, values, and integrity to gain what they've gained? Would you be able to give up what they'd given up in order to achieve their goals? Would you really be happy if you had what they have?

When comparing ourselves with others makes us feel inadequate, we are also less likely to take action to see how much we are capable of. When we feel and think small, we're less likely to venture out, in case we get trampled on. It's much easier to say "I'll never be able to do that!" than actually taking a risk and making an attempt. But we can only reach our potential by trying and taking risks and keeping at it.

If you truly want to be happy and successful, stop comparing yourself with others. Blindly chasing other people's definitions of success can never make you happy. Think about your own definition of success. Pursue and live your own version.


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比较是为了精进自己。不是为了无谓的竞争。如果有机会的话,不妨试试蹦极跳。它需要很大的勇气。但是,这份勇气并不是说说就行的。它需要你踏出第一步。

你敢尝试吗?为了自己勇敢一次罢!加油哦!

^_^g

Wednesday 19 December 2007

Self-Worthiness (Part 3)

In this post, let's continue to look at some key characteristics or disposition of people with a high level of self-worthiness.

Some say you can't escape worry; it's a undeniable fact of life. If you think something bad is going to happen, why should you be having a great time?

And to a certain extent I agree... I mean, if you feel the tremors of an earthquake coming on, you really wouldn't want to sit on the porcelain throne with a good book, if you know what I mean. You'd be worried sick, probably even panicking. And this kind of worry might even save your life, because you'd be driven to seek some safety or rescue.

But though worry can be useful in certain contexts, in most day-to-day situations, it's more of a bane than a boon. Just think of the things you usually worry about and you'll realise that for many of them, there's simply nothing you can do. And those things you can realistically do something about, you're so petrified with worry that you can't think of any solution or even have the motivation to do anything about them.

Worry can be a driving force, but for most of us, most of the time, it's simply a handicap. Unless you feel you can realistically do something about something you're worrying about, and will do it, there is simply no sense in worrying. Most of our worries relate to trivial problems anyway, like "will people like me at the party?" or things we can do nothing about, like aging. That's why one of the main habits of self-worthy people is the lack of worrying. "Care-free", not "care-less" is the watchword.

A self-worthy person is also able to appreciate most things around him. He is constantly mindful of the fact that Life itself is a wonder; that it's wondrous and worth being thankful for that he can move, can touch, can taste, can laugh, can see clearly with spectacles, lenses or laser treatment, can read a book, kick a ball, dig his toes into the sand, stroke a cat, and transport himself around swiftly in metal boxes that create cool, comfortable atmospheres and emit pleasant sounds from their speakers.

And finally, the hallmark of a self-worthy person is his ability to love people and other living things. He is constantly giving and receiving love. Whether it's planning a good time for someone, sharing his favourite food, or daily picking up someone from work, his mind is filled with thoughts of how to make others happy. And he is able to receive the rewards of this with equal enthusiasm; we all know the joy of giving... sometimes, we should also allow others to experience this joy.


source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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未雨绸缪没什么不好。但是过于担忧却会为你带来无限烦恼。有些时候,放开一切去尝试并没有任何损失的。加油!

^_^g

Tuesday 18 December 2007

Self-Worthiness (Part 2)

In the last post, we talked about how a healthy sense of self-worthiness is the fundamental building block of a happy, loving and successful life. In fact, it's the main reason for many of the emotional problems we face today like low confidence, self-loathing, lack of love, worry, fear, doubt and so on. We also talked about how one of the key characteristics of low self-worthiness is the need for other people's approval for your opinions and behaviour. Another one was how some people feel that they do not deserve happiness and therefore accept mistreatment and abuse from others.

Today, let's go through the main clues that hint at a person's high level of self-worthiness. These are characteristics that we would all do well to master.

First, a habit of thinking and acting spontaneously rather than from fears based on past experience. This means that you begin every task with a clean slate. Like an actor on stage, your previous scene has already transpired. Whether or not you stumbled on some words or gave it a lacklustre rendition, it's over. Period. You cannot go back and do the scene again. All you can do is give your next scene your best shot. Thinking about your performance in the last scene only preoccupies your mind with something you can't do a thing about and will likely adversely impact your next scene.

Another characteristic of self-worthiness is the freedom to enjoy each moment, unencumbered by regret or resentment from what's past or fear of what's to come. The past and future are an illusion, as they say. The only "real" moment is Now. If you can't savour the most of it, whatever it is, then you're wasting the moment. And it won't come back. So forget about how you quarrelled with your partner last night, how obnoxious you thought he or she was... today, remember that ultimately, you're in love with each other, you have this beautiful new day to enjoy together, so do it.

A self-worthy person also doesn't judge himself negatively. By "negatively", I mean in a way that is unconstructive and masochistic - that is, consistently saying to yourself "That was a dumb thing to say!" or "That was a stupid thing to do!", "You're so unattractive!" or "You never do anything right!" - you know, making shallow, sweeping statements about yourself without assessing the situation or making a commitment to do better next time. A self-worthy person knows that frequent self-beration gradually breaks down a healthy ego until the brain starts to believe these crippling remarks. The body soon begins to obey what the brain believes in and subconsciously instructs the body to do.

source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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要别人认同你,首先你要认同自己。不要小看自己,因为你我都有着无限的可能!

^_^g

Sunday 16 December 2007

Self-Worthiness (Part 1)

How easily is your ego bruised? How often do you shy away from social situations? How doubtful are you when it comes to your own opinions and actions? How satisfied are you with who you are and what you have? How harshly do you judge yourself? How often do you look to others for approval? How much love is in your life? How often do you worry?

Sorry if I overwhelmed you with the barrage of questions, but if your lingering sense is that you are generally unsure of yourself and that daily life, social interaction and relationships feel shallow and stressful for you, then perhaps you should try doing something about your self-worthiness.

If you think your self-worthiness is bed-ridden, then stop focusing on anything else. Almost nothing will work out for you if you don't get your self-worthiness up and running again.

You can never be happy by looking to others to validate your existence or value. The essence of self-worthiness is being true to yourself, no matter what you think others might think. No one else on earth is like you and therefore no one else on earth can know or understand you as well as you can. And regardless of what others may tell you about what's behind the door, only you can walk through it and find out for yourself. No one else can be responsible for you. Therefore, the first step to higher self-worthiness is to get to know yourself as well as you can, and to stop depending on the approval of others to fulfill you.

Some people have the misconception that they must suffer in life. They may not put it quite as simply as I have, but the core of the concept is similar. Somehow, they feel that life is suffering, that they must suffer for someone else's happiness, that misery is an essential part of life that must somehow be endured. Again, they feel this way because they do not think very highly of themselves; they feel they do not deserve to happy, that self-punishment is the only right thing to do, the only way they feel alive. That's why many people continue to allow themselves to suffer oppression, mistreatment, disdain and abuse.

Even though many people might say they want love and happiness; they might even pray for these things, but they do not take any real steps towards improving their situation. They continue to lament and wallow in self-doubt and misery, claiming helplessness when in reality, they're fully equipped to make things better anytime.


source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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大家会不会也有同感呢?有些时候我们总是被我们所谓的“自尊心”给打败了。。但是,别老是认为自己一无是处。所谓天生我才必有用嘛。

加油!

^_^g

Saturday 15 December 2007

Heaven and Hell

A holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said, 'Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'

The Lord led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water. The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful. But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.

The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell.'

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.

The holy man said, 'I don't understand.'

It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill. You see they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of themselves.'

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其实馆主觉得这篇故事很有意思。试想想,就算在你我周围,我们是否也是如此?如果我们为着他人着想,我们可能双双受益。但是我们往往自私自利,所以弄得最后两败俱伤。这又何必呢?

当然,我们不是为了受益而去对他人好。真正的好是发自内心的。大家学着罢!加油!

^_^g

Friday 14 December 2007

三字经 – 贞观之治

唐高祖 起义师 除隋乱 创国基
二十传 三百载 梁灭之 国乃改


释义
李渊从太原起兵推翻隋朝,开创了唐朝的基业,扫除了隋末的混乱。唐先后传了二十世,历时三百年。后来梁灭唐,于是改换了朝代。

故事
唐太宗 (tang2 tai4 zong1) 李世民登基后,吸取隋朝灭亡的教训,励精图治 (li4 jing1 tu2 zhi4),使社会经济迅速恢复。他还虚心听取别人的建议。大臣魏征 (wei4 zheng1) 是个敢于直言的人,他总是当面指出唐太宗的过失,唐太宗每次都能虚心地接受。由于唐太宗的开明,在他统治时期出现了中国历史上的盛世 --- “贞观之治 (zhen1 guan4 zhi1 zhi4)”。


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说真的,馆主好敬佩像唐太宗这样的君主。他的开明制度让国家旺盛,这是很重要的一环。就像现在虽然说开放,但是也不完全。说开明,我们之中是不是有人还是老古板呢?真正的开明不是嘴上说的,而是用行动来证明的。

学学唐太宗吧!

^_^g

Thursday 13 December 2007

三字经 – 瓦岗寨起义

迨至隋 一土宇 不再传 失统绪
dai4 zhi4 sui2 yi1 tu3 yu3 bu2 zai4 chuan2 shi1 tong3 xu4

释义
隋朝 (sui2 chao2) 的建立,使中国又形成了统一的局面。不过隋朝只延续了一代就丧失了政权。天下又失去了秩序。

故事
隋文帝杨坚死后,杨广即位,他追求荒淫腐化 (huang1 yin2 fu3 hua4) 的生活。命人开凿 (kai1 zao2) 运河,三次派兵征讨 (zheng1 tao3) 高丽,耗尽 (hao4 jin4) 了大量的物力和财力。老百姓走投无路,只好拿起武器,对抗朝廷,全国范围的农民起义风起云涌 (feng1 qi3 yun2 yong3)。各地的起义军中,以翟让 (zhai2 rang4) 领导的瓦岗军 (wa3 gang1 jun1) 最为著名。他们军纪严明 (yan2 ming2),专门攻击土豪劣绅 (tu3 hao2 lie4 shen1),惩治 (cheng2 zhi4) 贪官污吏 (tan1 guan1 wu1 li4),受到老百姓的拥护。后来瓦岗军多次打败隋朝的军队,为最终推翻隋朝起了积极作用。


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其实,大家有没有发现,我们读了好几篇在三字经中出现的历史故事后,每一个朝代的沦落是因为国君荒淫腐化的生活所造成的。所以,无论是什么时代 (就算是现在)也是如此的。如果哪一天我们的领导人(无论是社团、国家等)不抱着为了大家好的心,总有一天也会陷入同样的困境的。

但是无论如何,未来是掌握在大家的手里的。所以只要我们同心协力,一定能够创造美好的未来的!

^_^g

Monday 10 December 2007

4 Basic Steps on the Journey of Life

Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu famously said "The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step."

Indeed, as with everything in life, we learn by taking one step at a time. We may fall down, but we get back up and take another step. That is the only way to learn and to continue growing. In such a fast-paced modern world, however, some of us forget that principle. We try to run, inevitably trip and take a very painful tumble.

Some of us put off this journey of self-discovery and empowerment; we model ourselves against other people, we learn to suppress our genuine selves in order to fit in, we are terrified perhaps that if we opened ourselves up and looked in, we might not like what we see.

Well, like it or not, that's a risk we all have to face. With high risk comes high yield or a big loss. Unfortunately, most of us prefer to live in denial. We go about thinking the best or the worst of ourselves, until one day we fall down into the mud and we actually have to face ourselves. Who are you? What makes you special? What makes you YOU?

There are four basic steps that we need to follow on our journey.

Step One - Be prepared to look at yourself and admit that every bruise, every fall is all your doing.

Step Two - Surrender, let go of the idea that you should control every event, and have faith that everything you ask will be given to you.

Step Three - Sit down every day and write. Start a journal and every day record the events of the day, paying attention to your reactions to events, experiences, and people. Classify your reactions for what they were, whether they be anger, jealousy, resentment, joy, love, or self-pity.

By identifying your reaction and classifying it as your reaction to an event, you will come to see why you are acting as you are. Why you would react angrily in a situation that does not require anger; your own feelings and responsibilities.

Step Four - Ask why. "Why do I become angry in that situation?", "What is my deeper hidden feeling about this type of situation?". Start recording your "why's" in a separate book. In this book, record all your experiences and incidents of your past and how you reacted to them.

You will soon start to see that your current reactions can be traced back to past situations. Sooner or later we must admit that all our reactions are a result of our desires, expectations and our ego. Once you can trace your weaknesses, you will find ways to deal with them in a more constructive and positive way.


source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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的确,老子说的:《千里之行始于足下》大家应该不陌生罢?每一样事的开始都需要我们勇敢地踏出第一步才行。人生说长不长,但说短又不短。而一路走来,我们也会有开心不开心、难过、苦恼、烦恼、等等的时候。所以有时候,重要的是认清自己的感觉,懂得跌倒后爬起来。这才是最重要的。

不要害怕,就算再艰难也会过去的。加油了!

^_^g

Saturday 8 December 2007

三字经 – 孝文帝迁都

北元魏 分东西 宇文周 与高齐


释义
北方的北魏逐渐兴盛起来,后来分为东魏和西魏。北周宇文氏灭掉了东魏,北齐的高洋灭掉了西魏。

故事
魏孝文帝是个有作为的人,为了吸收中原的文化,改革一些落后的风俗,他决定迁都洛阳。然而,他的想法遭到大臣们的反对。于是,孝文帝借口伐齐,率大军三十万南下。到了洛阳,正赶上连绵的阴雨,道路泥泞难走,行军非常困难。孝文地坚持继续前进,大臣们不愿北伐,纷纷要求停止南下。魏孝文帝建大臣们已经在洛阳聚齐,就趁势宣布迁都洛阳。迁都的成功,为北魏的发展开创了新的局面。


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明君多谋,如果要成事,有些时候还是需要使用计谋的。像魏孝文帝他有远见,所以,他不顾大臣的反对,想办法迁都,最后还是成功了。而且,他的成功也为北魏的发展有所贡献。

所以嘛,有些时候呢,山不转路转;路不转人转。

^_^g

Friday 7 December 2007

实行

说行善积德,而没有以行动实行,是毫无意义的空谈,这样就像一朵美丽的红花,徒具颜色而没有芳香。

摒除 (bing3 chu2) 贪欲、憎恨和愚顽,具有正确的智慧,心里没有挂碍,不贪恋今生和来世,便是启发心智的实行者。

要教导别人,应该自己先以身作则,必须约束自己,没一举一动成为别人学习的模范,这样自然而然达到教导别人的效果。

阅读了一本有益的善书,而不去身体力行去做,也是没有多大的益处。

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馆主也觉得这没错,很多时候,我们只有纸上谈兵、空说话而已。如果没有真正的去实践我们所说的,那么不久只是空谈而已吗?要教育他人,就要从自己开始。如果自己都做得不对了,那么就变成没有资格去好好地教导别人不是吗?

大家要加油了唷!

^_^g

Wednesday 5 December 2007

"i am a door"

i am a door...
i am caught between two rooms
swinging from one to another.
grasping moments as the wind
sways me from the first to the next.
living, loving, caressing life in each
taking a little from one
and giving to the other, and back.

i hear the strains of my mother's voice
over the aroma of the eggplant curry
wafting over my father's intense study
of the Indian Express --- his favorite newspaper.
the aunts and uncles came in droves
to my sister's wedding to eat
and gossip during the ceremony,
and through the night.
glimpses of life... very Indian.

in the other room, the surround sound
heard Simon and Garfunkel over troubled waters,
while Pink Floyd cried about the walls in our lives.
Simpsons and Butterfinger were definitely in
as Gore and Quayle babbled using innocuous verbiage.
the computer was never shut off
as reams of paper saw term papers
discuss new ways to communicate.
glimpses of life... very American.

between these two worlds
i am happy, confused, angry
And in pain --- all at the same time.
for i am a door
caught between two rooms.
i see and feel both of them
but i don't seem to belong to either.

--- Nagesh, Rao (October, 1992)

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这是一首英文的诗句。讲述的是一个人,感觉就像是困于两个不同的世界。跟我们很多人很像。因为今时今日我们住在一个多元化的世界,因此很多时候会有种迷失自己的感觉。

是不是因为看不清前面的方向?认不清自己的定位到底在哪里?说实在的,因为世界的变化实在太快太大了,所以大家多多少少会觉得迷惘。但是如果可以的话,我们应该花一点儿时间好好地寻找我们人生中的方向。

馆主有时会觉得像有一些生长在新加坡的人,其实可以算是很幸福的,因为地理位置和历史的关系,大家是双语教育的环境 --- 这其实也可以算是个优势;可是,与此同时,我们就像是一群很努力、很认真的国民,但是却忙到像是无头苍蝇,不晓得自己的根在哪里。没有一个定位、没有找的属于自己或国家的特征。会不会到了最后,因为什么都懂、都拥有,而觉得格格不入,好像不属于任何一个定义?(neither here nor there, belonging to neither)

^_^g

Monday 3 December 2007

Why do we wait?

Two friends, A and E, were out on a stroll by the park.

E: If there's a company that sells information on when you will die, would you buy?
A: No.
E: Why not?
A: I believe death has to be unanticipated. It doesn't sound right to know when you will die.
E: But I would buy that information. At least to let me know when I will die 10 days earlier.
A: What are you going to do within these 10 days then?
E: I'll spend 5 days with my family and another 5 days with my loved one. Taking her to places we never been before. Driving to the peak of that mountain. Exploring new things to do together.
A: Why not do that now but wait till when you're about to die?
E: I just do not have the time now.

How often do we leave the things we want to do most last? And more often than not, we take them to our coffins. Let us wait no longer, and start doing the things we want to do the most now!

source: adapted (unknown)

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说得没错,往往我们都等了又等。为什么什么事情我们都不要把握现在而要推到将来呢?“等明天再说吧!” --- 这句话快成为我们都市人的口头禅了。《明日复明日,明日何其多?事事待明日,万事成蹉跎。》这首诗大家应该不陌生罢?我们到底拥有多少个“明日”?你我都不知道罢?既然如此,为什么还是要将所有的事情推到明天再说呢?

今日事今日成 --- 要尽量做到如此哦!

加油!

^_^g

Friday 30 November 2007

三字经 – 亡国之音

宋齐继 梁陈承 为南朝 都金陵
song4 1i2 ji4 liang2 chen2 cheng2 wei2 nan2 chao2 du1 jin1 ling2

释义
晋朝之后,先后有宋、齐、梁、陈四个朝代,他们被后世称为南朝,它们的国都 (guo2 du1) 均 (jun1) 设在金陵 (jin1 ling2)。

故事
陈霸 (chen2 ba4) 先推翻梁朝建立陈朝,史称陈武帝。后来后主陈叔宝 (chen2 shu1 bao1) 登上皇位。这个陈后主只知道吃喝享乐,他大建宫殿,还让宫里的人作曲,当时比较有名的乐曲是《玉树后庭花》。后来,隋文帝 (sui2 wen2 di4) 杨坚 (yang2 jian1) 率大军打进建康城时,守将来报告消息,陈后主正在欣赏《玉树后庭花》,当得知隋军打来后,吓得慌忙逃走,最后被隋军抓住,陈朝灭亡。后人因此把这首《玉树后庭花》成为亡国之音。


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庸君往往都没有好下场。身为一国之首,如果只懂得吃喝享乐,国家的灭亡是必然的。可能今时今日已经比较少类似的情况出现了,但是世界各地还是会时不时听到关于贪官等的新闻。做人之本要守信,人品修养也要有所进步才行。

我们虽然不是官员,但是也要提升自己的修养和品德哦!

^_^g

Thursday 29 November 2007

三字经 – 司马昭之心

故事
司马昭 (si1 ma3 zhao1) 是三国时期魏国 (wei4 guo2) 大将司马懿 (si1 ma3 yi4) 的儿子,他掌握着魏国的大权。他当上大将军后,还不满足,又逼魏帝曹髦 (cao2 mao2) 封他为晋公。曹髦很气愤地说:“司马昭想当皇帝的野心就连过路人都能看出来。” 于是他率领手下去杀司马昭,结果反被司马昭的手下杀死。曹髦死后,司马昭大权独揽 (du2 lan3),他假装立曹鱼为帝,自己称晋王 (jin4 wang2)。后来司马昭死了,他的儿子司马炎逼曹鱼让位,自己做了皇帝,建立了西晋王朝。


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知足常乐这句话大家有听过吧?有上进心和有野心是不同的。很多时候,因为自己的私心和野心,很可能会造成伤害。

^_^g

Tuesday 27 November 2007

Monday 26 November 2007

Mistakes Make Perfect

Think about the people you admire for their exceptional skill and quality of work. They hardly seem to trip up. Even when they do, they invariably pick themselves right up with panache and every strand of hair in place. Blunders that seem to floor the common person simply slide off them.

Let's consider one of mankind's greatest fears - public speaking. We all have to do this in some form at some point in our lives. Notice how no one is truly flawless? There is always some uncomfortable pause, some ill-timed joke, an unsuitable word, or the mic falls off the collar. But why do some faux pas appear worse than others? Why do we sometimes begrudge someone for a slip-up, yet seem to forgive others' blunders almost instantly?

The secret is in the perception of mistakes.

Successful, respected people have mastered their flaws. They understand the role they play in creating uniqueness and motivating learning. Most importantly, they realise that the more you are affected by a mistake, the more likely you're going to make more. The worse you feel about your trip-up, the more likely your audience is going to remember it negatively.

So when you fall, get right back up! Acknowledge it, but make sure people know that you're not going to be cowered by it. Shrug it off and move on. Everyone knows that mistakes are a part of life - they're natural and spontaneous. They may be expecting a watertight performance, but if a little rain should fall, they're very likely to perhaps giggle a little then wipe themselves dry, IF you do the same.

The more we learn about mistakes, the more we understand that really, mistakes make perfect. There is simply no other way to learn. We're all familiar with coughing profusely on our first trip to the swimming pool, our scars from falls from bicycles, the stack of complaints from customers who today are our most loyal consumers.

When we make a mistake, focusing on it simply makes it worse. Consistently high-performing people are not perfect, nor are they as "high-performing" as you might think. You may not remember their boo-boos, but that's only because you were more engaged with how good they were after that.

The world is not without its flaws. There will be earthquakes, there will be suffering, and skyscrapers will fall. Junk mail, sour milk, botched-up presentations and big red F letters on our test papers. And supermodels will continue to fall off runways. Yet, the world moves on. And so can you.
source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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成功或失败往往就在于我们的观点。如果我们积极地看待失败或犯错,我们就有进步的空间。如果我们就此认定自己是个失败的人,那么我们又怎么回进步或成功呢?

世界并不会因为某个人而停止旋转,太阳的升起也是个定律,没有什么是难得倒你我的。要有自信点儿!加油!!!

^_^g

Saturday 24 November 2007

Be Open to Possibilities

When you imagine your future, do you see unlimited potential or do you see a lack of opportunities? Almost everyday, we are overrun by bad news, bleak outlooks, and people who complain about how miserable their lives are. In such a climate, it's no small task remaining upbeat and optimistic. But it is precisely that kind of positive attitude that will open your eyes to the opportunities that are always present.

According to Rosamund Stone Zander, author of "The Art of Possibility", many of the circumstances appear to block us only because of the assumptions we make. In other words, if we colour our view of the world with negative energy, our behaviour towards it will appear to elicit an unfavourable response. If you look at your environment through cracked and grimy glasses, you won't see a pretty picture.

When you participate in negative dialogue, either with yourself or with others, you are setting yourself up for failure. It's almost as if there's an instinct to prove oneself right, and if you think things will turn out badly, your thoughts and action will contribute to that result. When you retreat from a world you perceive as grim, you're closing yourself off to the possibilities.

But what happens if you remain open to the possibilities? When you view the world from a perspective of unlimited potential, your attitude will shift. So will the way you engage your employees, customers, friends and family; everyone you come into contact with. You will project an image of abundance, and your drive and hope will inspire those around you. You will become a motivating force in a climate of openness and courage, a climate that gives back to you just as much, if not more, than what you gave to create it.

When we're open to possibilities, we see further and are more inclined to take risks. Risks that may not always yield the results we want, but which create more paths towards our goals. You're only a failure if you stop trying. Because opportunities for success are limitless - when one doesn't pay off the way you imagined, there's always the next, and the next. One of them will be the one to catapult you forward, and it could just be the next one.

Being open means that you have to stand confident in the realm of possibilities - no matter the competition and no matter your fear. If your entire focus is on what your competitors are doing, your attitude will be passed on to your employees, and, ultimately, your clients. But if you focus on what you do best and how to better satisfy your clients and engage with them in new and powerful ways, your results will be quite different!
source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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虽然馆主食有一点儿唠叨,但是馆主还是那句话:人有无限可能。其实很多时候,世事难料,所以一定要对自己有一定的肯定和信任,这样才有可能会成功啊,不是吗?

加油罢!

^_^g

Thursday 22 November 2007

三字经 – 赤壁之战

魏蜀吴 争汉鼎 号三国 迄两晋
wei4 shu3 wu2 zheng1 han4 ding3 hao4 san1 guo2 qi4 liang3 jin4

释义
汉朝末年,魏、蜀、吴三家争夺江山,历史上称为三国时期,后来晋朝统一了全国,先后经历了东晋和西晋两个王朝。

故事
曹操打败袁绍 (yuan2 shao4) 统一北方后,经过一段时间的整顿,又开始向南方进军,不费吹灰之力,就占据了荆州 (jing1 zhou1)。当时,刘备的军队人数很少,无法和曹操抗衡 (kang4 heng2),就听从军师诸葛亮的建议,联合孙权一起对抗曹操。曹操远道而来,士兵们不服水土,战斗力受到影响。曹操为了适应水战,命令把所有的战船首尾相连起来,东吴的周瑜使用火攻,联合刘备,大败曹军。曹操慌忙逃回北方,从此,三国鼎立 (ding3 li4) 的局面形成。

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如果馆主没有记错的话,曹操当时就因为把战船首尾都想练起来,因而造成很多兵士都战亡了。当时话说回来,三国真的是很有名气的一个时代。就像《三国演义》等,至今都还很令人津津乐道着。

^_^g

Tuesday 20 November 2007

Empower Yourself

Everyone goes through murky patches of their lives when they start feeling, for apparently no good reason at all, empty and directionless. This can happen when we're living on auto-pilot, getting lost in the rhythm of the ever turning wheels, and having no clear idea what we want or what we're doing. This lack of vision and control can be very disempowering.

So here are some ways you can reclaim control of your life and empower yourself to move into the future with confidence.

First, ask yourself "What do I want?" It's a simple question but the answer can be unexpectedly complex. Most of us don't even think about this question. But it's the most important thing you need to establish. Do you want more money? Give more love? Spend more time with your children? More health? Really meditate on this and listen to what comes back.

Next, ask yourself "What is stopping me from getting what I want?" Is it doubt? As in "I don't think I can go without a regular income." Or is it limiting beliefs? Such as "I'm too old for that." What about attachment? The unwillingness to let go of certain things in order for other things to come into your life. Upon close examination, you'll find that these things really can't hold you back. It's just fear.

Then look at where you are today. Are you getting from it all that you want? Or are you unhappy with the way things are? Even if you think you're miserable, you're getting something from it, otherwise you would have tried to get out of the situation. Many of us languish in self-pity because we're feeding our insecurities. Somewhere deep inside, we actually do like where we are because it means we don't have to take any action towards change. Change frightens us and so we make up the excuse that we're in a hopeless situation and continue doing nothing.

But the human spirit grows thin when it remains in an unchallenging place for too long. The emptiness you feel is precisely because you've not allowed for change to transform your life. You're doing the same thing which gives you no satisfaction day in day out and your heart is crying out for help. So the key really is to decide what you have to do to start changing your life in positive ways. And really take action.

Even small actions, like walking up the steps at the office instead of taking the lift gives you an empowering feeling of moving forward all the time.

source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio


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其实没错,往往我们都忘了给自己力量,忘了自己也是需要强心针的。更重要的是要积极地去面对人生的种种,不要再还没开始之前就贬低自己,这样的话,一定很难成功的。要相信自己!!!

^_^g

Monday 19 November 2007

學習溝通 (4)

延伸祕技5:要讓對方滿意,先讓對方接受

相對於「讓員工滿意」,理光(Ricoh)董事長濱田廣則是提出「讓員工接受」的說法。濱田廣認為,滿意度人人各不相同,要讓全部的人都滿意是非常困難的;但是只要讓員工確實「接受」,員工對工作就會比較容易產生熱情。

延伸祕技6:溝通從「聆聽」開始

積極聆聽者能夠站在發言者的立場,從對方的觀點來領會他們的想法與感受。以下幾項能協助你更有效積極聆聽的祕訣:

*保持穩定的眼神接觸。
*正向面對發言者。
*避免分心。
*專心聆聽,不要一心多用。
*等到對方確實結束發言,再做出回應。
*不要打斷對方,將它視為一個學習的機會。
*評估完整訊息(包桔言詞、聲音和視覺)。

source: 世界級專家之工作祕技(之八)


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嗯,没错!沟通从聆听开始!馆主非常赞成。很多时候,我们都只想到自己的立场而忽略了对方的想法。我们不一定一直都是对的,同样的,我们也希望对方能听我们的讲解和解释吧,所以,互相一定要聆听。沟通沟通,没代沟就能通!

好了,法师的教诲也就到了一个段落了。我们继续向其他方位进修学习罢!加油了!

^_^g

Sunday 18 November 2007

三字经 – 刘秀兴汉

光武兴 为东汉 四百年 终于献

释义
光武帝刘秀复兴汉朝后,称为东汉。西汉和东汉延续 (yan2 xu4) 了四百年,到了汉献帝时汉朝灭亡。

故事
王莽 (wang2 mang3) 政权末年,爆发了绿林军起义。刘秀和哥哥起兵响应,并在昆阳 (kun1 yang2) 之战中重创 (zhong4 chuang4) 王莽主力军,表现出杰出的政治军事才能。公元25年,刘秀称帝,史称东汉。之后刘秀消灭各路豪强 (hao2 qiang2) 势力,统一了中国。刘秀在位期间,实行休养生息政策,为解决当时严重的土地和奴婢 (nu2 bi4) 问题,先后九次下令,释放 (shi4 fang4) 奴婢;同时精兵简政,并在政治上进一步加强中央集权,加强尚书台的权利,这些措施 (cuo4 shi1) 的推行,使东汉的经济恢复,政治安定。后人将这一时期称为“光武中兴”。

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嗯,久违了的三字经。前些日子都在分享一些其他的,可是我们的三字经可不能就此忘却哦!噢,馆主读了今天的这篇后呢,感觉如果世上有更多像刘秀这样的贤者该有多好呀。现代的政治实在充满了太多问题了。咳,看了报告都让人心痛啊。当然,才者难得啊,所以如果我们有什么可以贡献于社会,有利于社会的,一定要付出哦!

^_^g

Saturday 17 November 2007

Silencing Your Inner Critic

Critics - can't live with them, some say we can't live without them. After all, they do sometimes provide useful advice. Very often though, our toughest detractors are not other people; our inner critic is usually the harshest of all, and because it's with us all the time, its constant disparagement can break us down and prevent us from achieving our full potential.

Don't underestimate that little voice inside your head that goes "You can't", "You'll fail", or "Don't risk it". Enough hammering and those limiting beliefs will become an inseparable part of you. So how can you make your inner critic shut up? Here are four ways that might help:

Tactic One: Know Your Enemy. In order to fight a good fight, you must spend some time getting to know your own thinking process. What are you saying to yourself? When a great idea pops into your head, what do you do with it? Many people diminish it until the good idea is but a mere memory.
So listen close and hear what your personal inner critic sounds like.

Tactic Two: Talk Back. Isn't it strange that we won't accept someone else putting us down, but we are quite content to let our inner critic do us in? Quit being your own worst enemy. When you hear "I can't", disagree immediately!

Tactic Three: Write It Down To Size. Once you have learned to recognize the inner critic, and you've started talking back, keep it in its place by writing it out. This takes a little more time and a little more discipline, but in the long run you will come out ahead. Write down all the icky, finicky, frustrating stuff in your head. Write freely with no editing, no reading, and no rereading. Just get it out. Vent and complain!. Then you'll be rid of the emotional clutter that can keep you from succeeding. And don't stop with just the negative bits. Write out your affirmations as well - your strengths, your blessings, your hopes, your achievements.

Tactic Four: Be Nicer to Yourself. In other words, give yourself permission to be a little insane. Be better to yourself! It's high time you did! Praise yourself, give yourself treats, rewards for good work done, indulge your desires sometimes, look in the mirror and see what a beautiful person you are! Write down ten great things about yourself and read them everyday. Before long, you'll begin to see that you are right. You have amazing potential and superb ideas.

Now, you're the verge of making your dreams a reality.

source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

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噢,虽然馆主会鼓励大家要时时自我反省,但是我们不能忘了要将自己的心魔给先打败才行。其实很多时候,自己才是我们通往理想的绊脚石。因此,我们要认清方向,自己觉得不好的地方就改进;好的就再加强。我们不只是有坏的一面,也有我们优秀的地方,所以,也要好好地肯定自己哟!

加油!

^_^g

Tuesday 13 November 2007

Team Hoyt

Dick and Rick Hoyt --- a role model; a father's love for his son.

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馆主不晓得大家是否有看过这个短片,真的很感人。那位父亲的伟大、无私的爱。为了心爱的儿子翻山越岭,通过了一次又一次的比赛。感动了世人,更让儿子的心愿成真。看看吧!

^_^g

Monday 12 November 2007

學習溝通 (3)

延伸祕技3:善用故事打動人心

假如你想引發行動,你可以考慮用對大家說故事的方式,而不是只告訴他們該做什麼。假如你發號施令,大家可能會用頭腦來回應;但假如你靠說故事來領導,大家則會用「心」來回應。

延伸祕技4:再一開始就得到許多「是」的答覆與別人交談,不要先討論你不同意的事,要先強調你所同意的事

懂得溝通技巧的人,會在一開始就先得到許多「是」的答覆,這可以引導對方進入肯定的方向。
就像撞球一樣,原先你打的是一個方向,只要一稍有偏差,等球碰回來時,完全與你期待的方向相反了。當你說了一個「不」字,對方所有本性裡的自尊都會自然往反方向堅持下去。所以,如何讓對方一開始就有肯定的方向,這是很重要。

source: 世界級專家之工作祕技(之八)

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人们都像是爱听故事的小孩儿一样 [哈哈,馆主就很爱听故事,但是个老人了罢!哈哈!:p],所以,如果希望队员用“心”而不是只用“脑”来做事的话,试着用故事吧!=)嗯,与其说撞球,如果要形容的是人与人之间的沟通,就像是在打网球,一来一往的才能让游戏精彩、继续。也许,在很多时候,你的立场是什么自己要先弄清楚,这样一来,就不至于陷入进退两难的情况了。

^_^g

Sunday 11 November 2007

*Two Choices*

What would you do?....you make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice?

At a fund raising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?'

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. 'I believe, that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.'

Then he told the following story:

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. His father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.

The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!' Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!' Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball ... the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay!!!'

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third! Shay, run to third!'

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

AND NOW A LITTLE FOOTNOTE TO THIS STORY: We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message. Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.' So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.

You now have two choices:
1. Delete
2. Forward
May your day, be a Shay Day


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馆主必须承认,虽然这篇文章已经读了几遍,但是,每次在读的当儿,还是会两眶盈泪。谢谢钧韡小姐和我们分享这篇文章。真的很感人。我们是否有时不时将他人摆在第一位?可以不可以将胜利抛在脑后,为了他人一次呢?很多时候,我们总会愤愤不平地埋怨为什么上帝让我们有一些残缺,但是,上帝在造人时,早已经自由打算了。我们所拥有或缺少的,就是要来让世界变得更完整、更美好,我们的一切一切冥冥中早已注定、安排得好好的。所以,要相信“天生我才必有用”,不要再埋怨了,学习感恩一切的恩赐罢!

馆主不晓得大家读了这篇文章后有何感想,与大家分享一下吧!

^_^g

Thursday 8 November 2007

Master Your Thoughts

We’re all built with incredible propensity to imagine the worst. Let’s say you notice a strange spot on your chest. You begin to think "something is wrong." This quickly becomes “it’s a STD” or “it’s cancer”. In no time at all, you arrive at the idea that you’re going to die from this. Well, that settles it then, time to plan the funeral.

You see how we can catatrophize matters? And it’s not just in areas such as our well-being; it’s our children, our careers, our finances, our partner, or the superior we thought we offended. If we start catching ourselves imagining disastrous scenarios that are not grounded in facts, we’ll realize that our thoughts can go askew very easily. And they affect our emotional and mental well-being. Sometimes, they can even make us physically sick!

To reduce unnecessary angst, focus on the situation at hand. Nothing more. A spot is just a spot. Until you see a doctor or get more information, further thought is useless and can be dangerous.

The thing is, a thought is just a thought. Some thoughts may be more useful, but that makes them no more real.

The trouble begins when we buy into the thoughts. When we start believing that they have some inherent truth or reality.

A good way out of this trap is to imagine a continuum, a line between two extremes. At one end is the idea that "A Thought Is Reality." At this extreme, people believe that whatever pops into their head is real. In other words, "if I think it, it is real." The extreme is what we know as psychosis, that is, no matter what others or bare facts tell me, I simply choose to believe my thoughts.

At the other end of the continuum is the idea that "A Thought Is Just A Thought." If a thought begins to torment a person at this end of the spectrum, he or she is able to take a step back, remember that a thought is just a thought, and let it go. If it warrants some follow-up action, go ahead, but until then, don’t let your thoughts slip into the gunk of fear and imagination.

Thoughts really only have as much power as we give them. No more, no less.
Become aware of your thoughts. Master your thoughts and you master your world.


source: Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

我们是不是也常常陷入苦恼当中?[庸人自扰] 是一位馆主很尊敬的哥哥前辈教育馆主的。很多时候,烦恼是来自我们自己的念头。当然,我们时时要为将来做好准备,但是不要过于担忧。无谓的担忧只会让日子难过。还没发生的事情不代表它就不会发生,但是,谁有十足的把握它一定会发生?未来是掌握在你我手里的。如果事情已经发生了,那就看看结果会是如何,可以弥补的,我们就尽力去办到;没办法挽救的,就交由命运了。

加油加油!记住:快乐就是不把困难变成困扰!

^_^g

Tuesday 6 November 2007

學習溝通 (2)

延伸祕技1:溝通三要件

溝通的第一要件,就是真誠,真心誠意地說出你的看法,只要真心,不要擔心別人認為你是在諂媚。第二、肯定對方表達意見的權利。第三、要婉轉、正面、積極地表達。

延伸祕技2:善用會議有效溝通

身為全球流通零售業龍頭的沃爾瑪(Wal-Mart)百貨,一年365天都有新的門市在世界的某個角落開張,沃爾瑪領導人在溝通上面臨了很大的困難,他們利用各種方法來克服這項困難,包括現場衛星轉播、沃爾瑪電視與廣播網、名為「沃爾瑪世界」的公司電子報、官方網站、電子郵件、公司的教育訓練課程、順暢的溝通政策、員工意見調查、夥伴工作手冊、以及各種的溝通會議,諸如:

●管理團隊每周開周會--每星期六早上7點,沃爾瑪的管理團隊會 齊聚在總部,討論本周的心得,提出必須調整的事項。

●店長每周舉行電話會議--每星期六早上,區經理會召集店長進行電話會議,讓各店長了解最新的公司消息。

●門市員工每天站著開早會--在每家沃爾瑪門市,全體成員每天早上都會站著開會,這場會議十分簡短,重點在於傳達新資訊。


source: 世界級專家之工作祕技(之八)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

噢,沟通的第一要件是什么?是真心诚意。你我学习到了吗?

^_^g

Monday 5 November 2007

學習溝通 (1)

證嚴法師祕技1:「放空」與「專注」
曾有人問證嚴法師如何獲得溝通的智慧?證嚴的祕訣是「放空」與「專注」。

聽別人說話時,必須先將自己放空,不可心存成見,才能將別人的話真正聽進去。另外就是專注於現在,因為未來是妄想,過去是雜念,唯有專心於當下,智慧才不會停滯不前。

證嚴法師祕技2:溝通的智慧
什麼是溝通?如何與人溝通?不同生活背景與知識程度的人,能否溝通?證嚴以為,就現實上來說,觀念、目標、習氣相近的,比較容易溝通,但是起點 仍在個人。要先能心思平靜,先能傾聽;先有了可以捐棄自己成見、虛心接受別人想法的胸襟和智慧,才有真正的溝通。因此所謂「溝通」,不是要人家和我溝通,而是自己如何與人溝通;要別人退一步,自己進一步,不是溝通,只是說服。

證嚴法師祕技3:理直氣「和」
遇到理念不合的人,要如何回應?證嚴認為,信念要堅定、要展現出更大的耐心和誠意,但「理直」必須「氣和」,才能讓人心悅誠服。

source: 世界級專家之工作祕技(之八)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

谢谢婉琳小姐与我们分享的这篇文章。这将会是新的一系列关于沟通的篇章。首先,让我们看看證嚴法師所提的秘技作为参考。下来几次,我们会学习一些被分享的技巧,看看该怎样与他人好好地来沟通。虽然是属于工作秘技,但是馆主觉得我们在日常生活中也需要与他人沟通,所以应该也蛮管用的罢。

加油咯!

^_^g

Sunday 4 November 2007

Fate of Dolphins in Taiji

Documentary of Dolphins in Taiji:


Oct 2006, in Taiji, Japan:


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

馆主不记得之前是否有将一个关于中国非法动物宰杀和伤害的短片放送在这儿,但是这个关于海豚在日本被残杀的短片真的很令人心酸。谢谢钰惠小姐和我们分享这个纪录片。大家会不会觉得渔夫们很残忍?更让馆主心寒的是有位日本小朋友 (应该还是小学生罢)经过海豚被杀害的现场的那一幕 --- 他竟然无动于衷。这表示他已经习惯了。好令人心痛哦。习惯、看惯了这些残忍的行为;不为所动了。这是我们希望我们的下一代所学习的吗?我们希望他们长大后也都是个残忍、血腥的人吗?有必要那么的铁石心肠吗?

好可恶、好可怕、好残忍、好令人难过。海豚不是可爱的动物吗?不是和平的动物吗?它们信任人们,所以毫无防备地一步步踏入圈套里 --- 这是个死亡圈套。海豚是爱好生命的,就算亲友受了伤,明知道会有危险,它们也不会丢下它们不管。咳!

不要伤害无辜的生命了,好吗?每一份力量都有可能可以制止这一切!其实,人们伤害和杀害动物是为了他们的皮和肉。试想想,如果有一天我拿起屠刀要杀你的家人朋友只是为了他的皮和肉,你觉得怎样?既然不行,为什么要这样对待动物呢?

^_^g

Wednesday 31 October 2007

What goes around comes around

One day, a man saw an old lady stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her.

Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry.

He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was those chills which only fear can put in you.

He said, 'I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson.'

Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.

As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid.

Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.

He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, 'And think of me.'

He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.

A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered, Bryan ..

After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin.

There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: 'You don't owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you.'

Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.

Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard....

She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, 'Everything' s going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson.'


There is an old saying 'What goes around comes around.' Today, I sent you this story and I'm asking you to pass it on... Let this light shine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

谢谢惠芝小姐与我们分享的故事。其实,馆主上两张文章有提到无论我们做什么都是不求回报的。因为真正行善的人是不计较也不屑于这些的。像这篇故事里的 Bryan Anderson,虽然自己家里并不富有,但是他善良的心、乐于助人而不为回报的态度最终还是有上天赐给他的福报。让善的福音传遍世间各个角落罢!

^_^g

Monday 29 October 2007

Interview with God



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

其实在几年前,当馆主第一次看了这个“访谈”后,当时的感触很深。是感动?是震撼?还是不解?每个人的体会也许会不同,但重点在于我们有没有认真地去体会这篇“专访”存在的意义?

也许我们真的该好好思考了罢。

^_^g

Saturday 27 October 2007

行善

及时行善,可以避免你的心里再泛起坏的念头。凡是拖延行善的人,内心不容易与恶行绝缘。

人生难免一死,应该趁有生之年多做一点善事,宛如在门前种下菩提树,每天施水,不断地长大茂盛,子孙后代可乘凉。

莫轻视小善,以为小善不会得到福报,每天行一小善,累月经年,不断积聚,而致使你整个人充满福德。

在愤怒的人群中要容忍;在凶暴的人群中要温和;在贪的人群中要慷慨。

不做任何坏事,培养善行和慈悲心,清净自己的心念,这是佛陀的教诲。

富有的人,应秉着怜悯的心来布施贫穷的人。贫穷的人应该了解人生的价值,敞开心胸,努力行善改变命运。

做事和布施时,如果抱着利人之心,那么跟你疏远的人也容易和好;倘若抱着害人之心,即使亲如父子也会分离并且互相怨恨。

富豪者顺知:
万能的是金钱,万恶的也是金钱。
用之于正,是自造福基;用之于邪,是自作孽障。
若能减一份享用,加一分济人,虽不见福增,但祸自消矣。
如一味刻薄,以为得计,一遇飞灾,倾家荡产,所入不偿所失,悔之晚矣!

世间三种财宝:
在世抢得去,死后带不去 --- 金银珠宝。
在世抢不去,死后带不去 --- 智慧才能。
在世抢不去,死后带得去 --- 修善积德。

所以
德厚者,来世得生乐土。
德薄者,来世生于贫苦。

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

说真的,馆主也觉得这篇有点儿深奥。嘻!但是总的来说,不就是叫我们要多行善积德嘛。其实,真正的善行不在于、也不求于回报。真心的希望他人好才是真正的善行。如果是因为希望他人会感激你,会报答你,那么就免了。当然,只要你有这份心,无论是什么样的善行,也是值得我们学习的。

要时时存有善念哦!

^_^g

Monday 22 October 2007

三字经 - 王莽篡位

故事

汉平帝是汉朝最后一个皇帝,当时朝廷的大权掌握在外戚手中。王莽 (wang2 mang3) 也属于外戚,但他不像其他弟子那样骄奢淫逸 (jiao1 she1 yin2 yi4),总是给人留下简朴、谦虚的印象。后来他当了大官,但仍和从前一样待人温和。即使自己的儿子犯了罪,他也依照法律进行处罚。后来,他大权在握,立刻变得飞扬跋扈 (fei1 yang2 ba2 hu4) 起来。他唆使 (suo1 shi3) 下属编造谎言,逼迫小皇帝让位。王莽当了皇帝后,顶国号为“新”。后来,刘秀推翻了王莽的政权,重新建立了汉王朝。


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

所谓人心难测啊。没想到王莽是如此的一个人。如果事实真是如此一般,那么,他很可能是一个心机很重的人哦。他一直给予人们那美好的形象和态度全在他掌握大权后被打破了。原来也不过是如此而已。真让人难过啊。

我们一定要做个顶天立地的人哦。无论是在于课业或工作,既是我们想要得到更高的职位或权力,我们也不可以耍心机或陷害他人哦。如果一个人不是真心地对待他人,这只会让大家得到伤害,而且,这份伤害也许一辈子也没有办法弥补哦。不要作出任何会让自己在将来后悔的事好吗?

加油了!

^_^g

Sunday 21 October 2007

三字经 – 鸿门宴

高祖兴 汉业建 至孝平 王莽篡


释义
刘邦打败项羽后,建立了汉朝的基业,史称高祖;传到汉平帝时,被奸臣王莽 (wang2 mang3) 篡夺 (cuan4 duo2) 了帝位。

故事
刘邦和项羽都是秦朝末年的大英雄,刘邦攻破秦朝的都城 (du1 cheng2) 咸阳 (xian2 yang2) 后,驻军在灞上 (ba4 shang4)。项羽的军队驻扎在新丰 (xin1 feng1)。刘邦手下的曹无伤告诉项羽说,刘邦有称王的野心。项羽就请刘邦到红门赴宴,席间,项羽的谋士范增指使项庄舞剑,想让他借机杀死刘邦。多亏项伯的保护,刘邦才幸免于难。危急时刻,刘邦的护卫斥责 (chi4 ze2) 项羽不守信用,使项羽放弃了杀死刘邦的念头。刘邦装作上厕所,逃回了汉营。后来,刘邦扭转 (niu3 zhuan3) 了不利局面,并最终战胜了项羽。

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

无论何时,人与人之间真的很讲求信用二字。其实,鸿门宴之所以如此有名就是因为当时很有名有很会作战的两名战士刘邦和项羽赴此宴。还有,其实当刘邦去赴宴时,早就已经有一定的心理准备了。既然是敌,那么多少也要抱有一定的戒备心才行。但无论如何,馆主始终排斥那些不守信用的举动和行为。

希望大家都会努力做个守信用的人哦!

^_^g

Friday 19 October 2007

The Pencil

The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box.

"There are 5 things you need to know", he told the pencil, "before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and you will become the best pencil you can be.

ONE: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in Someone's hand.

TWO: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you'll need it to become a better pencil.

THREE: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make.

FOUR: The most important part of you will always be what's inside.

AND FIVE: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write.

The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart. The parable of the pencil imparts great wisdom in the way we human beings live our lives as well.

Allow this parable on the pencil to encourage you to know that you are a special person and only you can fulfill the purpose to which you were born to accomplish.

Never allow yourself to get discouraged and think that your life is insignificant and cannot make a change.

We are just like the pencil, who can make a difference in our lives and in the lives of the people around us. Don't ever underestimate what you have the power to do!

- AUTHOR UNKNOWN -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

你我就像是只铅笔,总是认为自己微不足道,但是事实不然。所以一定要记住以上提到的五点哦。如果要华文的,馆主尽量啦:
1)你能成就大事,但是你需要让自己被我在祗的手里
2)你时不时会经历艰苦的磨练,但这是为了让你成为更有用的人
3)你有能力纠正你所犯过的错误
4)你最重要的部分是在于内在
5)凡走过必留痕迹。所以无论如何,你都要一直走下去。

切记:“凡走过必留痕迹,但只要走错一步,留下的却是无法磨灭的污迹。”

Sunday 14 October 2007

心境

一个人的言谈和举止充满真诚的善意,坦率又热情,那么快乐便时刻伴随着他。

人的一切行为由心主导,内心存恶念、贪念、恨念者,其言谈举止也显露出恶、贪、恨的意念,那么苦恼便时刻伴随着他。

每天接触世俗事务的时候,不被财色所诱惑,没有忧愁烦恼,内心安乐坦然自若,这是真正幸福的人生。

聪明的人时常检查、清除内心的污垢,就如同人日常洗脸、漱口、洗澡一样清洁身体。

善于防止心意的愤怒,安定心意,清除任何邪恶的意念,真诚修善积德,使你迈向美好的人生。
怀着互相依赖的心理,只会责备和埋怨;怀着自己依靠的心理,就会发奋图强。

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

其实,我们的任何念头都有可能影响我们或他人的一生的哦。真的,任何起心动念都有它的连环效应,所以我们一定要谨慎。你今天又是怀着怎样的心念的呢?希望大家天天都是存好念、善念哦!

^_^g

Wednesday 10 October 2007

The Starfish Story

Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly
make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."

- Adapted from The Star Thrower by Loren Eiseley (1907 - 1977)


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我们是不是因为总觉得我们无论多么的努力都是白费的而就轻易放弃呢?其实,就算前方看似尽头了,也并不代表我们只剩下绝望。很多时候,我们不经意的一个小动作很有可能对他人有很大的影响,所以,无论机会多渺茫,都要尽一份力。

^_^g

Monday 8 October 2007

三字经 - 立木为信

故事

战国初期,秦国只是一个西方的小国,但依靠商鞅 (shang1 yang1) 的变法,最终统一了中国。但商鞅在变法初期,遇到了很多阻碍。商鞅为了让人们相信自己,就派人在京城的南城门前立了一根三丈长的木杆,并说谁 (shei2) 能把它搬到北门,就赏十金,结果没人相信。后来,商鞅又把赏钱提高到五十金,终于有个人忍不住,把木杆扛到了北门,他果然得到了五十金。于是人们都知道商鞅说的话是算数的。新法颁布后,很顺利地推行了,商鞅变法使秦国走向了富强。


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商鞅很棒对不对?哇,馆主好佩服他的智哦。嘻,其实呢要顺利地完成一项任务、一个挑战,《信》真的很重要。馆主老是根大家说要相信自己,其实也是因为如果连自己都不相信自己了,那么其他人又凭什么要去相信你呢?知道为什么很多领袖能带领人们走向一个新的幢景、另一个高峰吗?因为人们信任他。无论是他才智过人与否(虽然这人往往都是如此优秀),只要能建立起信用,就能比较顺利地完成使命。

所以啊,五常和八德里不也都有提到〈信〉吗?由此可见〈信〉的重要性哟。我们也要学习做个言信、守信的人哦。

^_^g

Tuesday 2 October 2007

三字经 – 揭竿而起

赢秦氏 始兼并 传二世 楚汉争


释义
秦始皇在位时,秦国开始兼并六国,并建立了统一的秦王朝。秦朝只传了两代就灭亡了,后来楚霸王 (chu3 ba4 wang2) 项羽和汉王刘邦争夺天下。

故事
秦始皇统一中国后,残暴的对待人民,焚书坑儒 (fen2 shu1 keng1 ru2),迫害忠良,还修筑 (xiu1 zhu4) 了阿房宫 (e1 fang2 gong1) 和万里长城,人民怨声载道 (yuan4 sheng1 zai4 dao4)。后来,他的儿子胡亥 (hu2 hai4) 登基 (deng1 ji1),他荒淫无道的统治终于导致了中国历史上第一次大规模的农民起义。一次,陈胜、吴广和九百多人被征调去修长城,途中因为大雨耽误 (dan1 wu4) 了日期,按照秦朝的法律,误期将被处死。于是,他们号召人们起来反抗秦朝的统治。起义像烈火烧遍全国,并最终形成了由项羽 (xiang4 yu3) 和刘备领导的两支部队。


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哟,大家是不是觉得微笑学习馆最近怎么老是分享英文的文章而已啊?安啦安啦,馆主当然不会让那种事情发生咯。只是那几篇英文的文章实在太值得与大家分享了,所以就被穿插在其中咯,要不然你们又老是说馆主只分享华文文章。哎哟,不可能同时满足所有人罢?请多多见谅了唷。

嗯,好了,话说回来,其实以馆主浅见,秦始皇为中华文化和历史也算是有功啦。只不过他的做法有点儿极端。如果不是他,我们现在也不会有那么一个世界奇观之一的万里长城了,对吧?当然,那么一个建筑其实是有很多无辜的百姓用生命换来的成就。试想想,我们今时今日有着那么多的科技可以帮助我们完成伟大的建筑,可是在以前,他们可是用着血和汗来完成的。更何况,那时候是被逼、被强迫和虐待的。好难过、好可怜对吧?所以我们要好好地珍惜现在所拥有的一切,也庆幸现在生长的地方没有这些事情的发生。同时,要想想我们这世界上还是有人是受着这样的苦哦。

^_^g

Monday 1 October 2007

Miracles in Life

Miracles do happen. Hope yours comes true too.

A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from its hiding place in the closet.

She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully.

Three times, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.

Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door.

She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention, but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did it!

'And what do you want?' the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice. I'm talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven't seen in ages,' he said without waiting for a reply to his question.

'Well, I want to talk to you about my brother,' Tess answered back in the same annoyed tone. 'He's really, really sick ... and I want to buy a miracle.'

'I beg your pardon?' said the pharmacist.

'His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?'

'We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry but I can't help you,' the pharmacist said, softening a little.

'Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs.'

The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He stooped down and asked the little girl, 'What kind of a miracle does your brother need?'

' I don't know,' Tess replied with her eyes welling up. 'I just know he's really sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to use my money.'

'How much do you have?' asked the man from Chicago .

'One dollar and eleven cents,' Tess answered barely audibly.

'And it's all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to.'

'Well, what a coincidence,' smiled the man. 'A dollar and eleven cents - the exact price of a miracle for little brothers.'

He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said 'Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need.'

That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well.

Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place.

'That surgery,' her Mom whispered. 'was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?'

Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost ... one dollar and eleven cents ... plus the faith of a little child.

In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need.

A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law. I know you'll keep the ball moving!

Here it goes. Throw it back to someone who means something to you!

A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end. It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends. But the treasure inside for you to see is the treasure of friendship you've granted to me.


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谢谢月莉小姐与我们分享的这篇故事。当馆主读这篇故事时,脑海里浮现着前几年读到的另一篇故事。那是关于一个小男孩为了救妹妹而对医生说他要捐血给妹妹,在输血的过程中,男孩一直对妹妹说要勇敢。输血完毕后,男孩转头问医生:“那我现在是不是就要死了?”

可爱、幼小无知的小男孩以为捐血给了妹妹是将自己身体里的所有血都捐给妹妹,所以之后就会死去。但是,他却很勇敢地愿意捐血。不因为什么,就因为“她是我妹妹”。简简单单的一份兄妹情。

小朋友的天真烂漫是无法取代的。它时时让人窝心,让人感动。可是,当我们慢慢长大了以后,却忘了这最初的心。忘了真正的快乐是金钱和时间无法取代、无法买到的。什么是奇迹?奇迹是靠我们自己去创造的。只要是真心诚意的、是努力过的,奇迹就在身边。像两篇故事里的奇迹,它是因为小朋友们的真诚感动了天地、是他们的爱和无条件的付出救回了自己的手足。

加油哦!在这个儿童节,馆主祝福天下的儿童都平安、快乐、健康、保持着单纯的心。

^_^g

Friday 28 September 2007

Self-Limiting Beliefs

Self-limiting beliefs are those things you believe about yourself that place limitations on your abilities. They may be conscious or unconscious. They may be founded or unfounded. For example?

"I am fat, so no one will marry me."

"I am not lucky; I won't get the job."

Now it may well be a fact that you are fat. That no one will marry you as a result definitely isn't. And luck isn't the criterion for getting a job. You get jobs based on merit.

Many limitations exist only in your mind. You can do anything if you make up your mind to do it. Determination always finds a way around obstacles.

Our thoughts and beliefs colour our vision and perception of the world. They determine our actions or inactions. Thoughts affect feelings. Feelings affect behaviour. Behaviour produces results (or the lack of them). It all begins with our thoughts, since we have to accept a thought for it to become a belief.

It's been said that whatever you believe becomes your reality. You do not believe what you see; rather you see what you already believe. For this reason, two people facing the same situation may interpret it differently, act according to their different beliefs and experience different outcomes.

Fortunately, you can get rid of self-limiting beliefs. But first you have to identify them. They could be lurking in the recesses of our minds without our awareness. Talking with a friend or consulting with a coach could give you more objective feedback as to their existence.

Once you have identified them, these limiting beliefs must be challenged every time they rear their heads. You must consciously reject any thought or suggestion that you are limited in any way. When self-limiting thoughts are starved of attention, they wither and die. What are some self-limiting beliefs you can reject today?


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缺乏自信心 --- 这应该是我们很多人的通病罢?成功最大的敌人就是自己。因为仗都还没打就投降了。哎哟!要相信自己,因为是你,所以一定能做到的!!! 加油加油!!!

^_^g

Saturday 22 September 2007

STORIES - The Weight of the Glass

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy do you think this glass of water is?"

Answers rang out through the room. Some said 20g, others said 500g.

The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it."

He continued, "If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

"And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden."

"So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."

"Relax! Pick them up later after you've rested. Life is short. Enjoy it!"

AUTHOR UNKNOWN
(adapted from Eugene Loh, A Slice of Life, 938LIVE, a station of MediaCorp Radio')

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我们是不是常常这样,一直固执地将困难和烦恼扛着,久久不肯放下?压力压力 --- 是压迫自己的一股力量。但是很多时候这股难以承受的力量是来自自己的放不开、放不下。馆主之前有去参加过一个讲座,讲师就将现代人为什么不喜欢回家、或不喜欢家里的人做了一次分析:我们老是喜欢将工作或学校的不开心带回家里 (因为家里人会无条件地受你的气),可是这一来一往就将彼此的距离扩大,让人反感,最后就演变成讨厌家和家人了。

不要将家人当作是理所当然的、不要将你在外受到的气带回家去。家是温暖的,但是它的温暖需要每一位成员来扶持。这份温暖将把你受到的任何委屈减到最低。所以,要好好珍惜!

不要过于给自己压力。记住:快乐就是不把困难变成困扰!

^_^g

Thursday 20 September 2007

三字经 – 长平之战

故事
战国后期,秦国逐渐强大起来,他们加快了统一全国的步伐 (bu4 fa2),不久就打到了赵国的边境。赵国著名大将廉颇 (lian2 po1) 去长平 (chang2 ping2) 抵挡,有效地阻止了秦国的进攻。秦国采用反间计,派人到处散布谣言,挑拨 (tiao3 bo1) 赵王和廉颇的关系。赵王果然中计,撤换 (che4 huan4) 了廉颇,派只会纸上谈兵的赵括 (zhao4 kuo4) 接替廉颇。赵括轻率出兵,结果几十万大军被秦军包围,赵括也被乱箭射死,赵国40万大军全军覆没 (quan2 jun1 fu4 mo4)。长平之战后,再也没有国家可以和秦国抗衡 (kang4 heng2) 了。

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馆主一直以来最不喜欢,但却发现世间不断发生的现象---人言可畏啊。到底为什么人类会有舌头呢?舌头的创造是为了让天下子民能尝尽人世间的酸甜苦辣、体验人生的种种,更能学习感恩。但是,我们却都把嘴和舌用来道长论短、散播是非谣言。哎哟!

好啦,今天的这篇三字经只有故事,让大家多些认识战国后的事。下回儿再继续其他三字经内容和解说故事咯!

^_^g

Monday 17 September 2007

An American Mother

My mum only had one eye. I hated her… She was such an embarrassment.

She cooked for students and teachers to support the family. There was this day during elementary school where my mum came and say hello to me. I was so embarrassed. How could she do that to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out.

The next day, one of my classmates said “EEE, your mum only had one eye!”

I was so embarrassed. I wanted to bury myself so as no one will laugh at me again. I also wanted my mother to disappear.

So I confronted her one day and said “If you’re gonna make me a laughing stock, why don’t you just die?!”

My mum did not respond.

I was oblivious to her feelings as I was filled with anger. I wanted to have nothing got to do with her. So I studied real hard and got myself a chance to study in Singapore.

After graduating, I got married, bought myself a house and had kids. I was satisfied with my life, kids and the comfort.

Then one day, my mother came to visit me. She had not seen me for years and did not know I have kids. When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her and I yelled at her for coming over uninvited. I screamed at her, “How dare you come over and scare my children. Get out of here NOW!”

My mother quietly answered, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address.” and she disappeared out of sight.

One day, a letter regarding school reunion was sent to my house in Singapore, so I lied to my wife that I have to go on a business trip. After the reunion, I went to the old shack that I had stayed out of curiosity.

My neighbours said that she died. I did not shed a single tear. They handed me a letter that she wanted me to have.

"My dearest son,

I think of you all the time so I came to Singapore to visit you. I am sorry that I scared your children. I was glad to hear you coming for the reunion but I may not be able to get out of the bed to see you. I am sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you during the years when you were growing up. You see, I have got no choice. When you were young, you got into an accident and lost your eye. As a mother, I could not stand watching you growing up with one eye. So I gave you mine. I was so proud of my son who is seeing a whole new world, in my place, with that eye.

With my love to you,
Your Mother."


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母爱的伟大不是应该的、不是理所当然的、更不是必然的,却是她无条件为了她疼爱的孩子而奉献的。

我们是否也会瞧不起自己的父母?“唉哟,为什么我父母不是有钱人?”;“为什么我的爸爸不是大老板?”;“为什么我的父母长得这样丢人现眼?”;等。有没有想过,我们的身体发肤是授之父母,他们把我们养大、教育我们、尽力让我们的衣食住行不成问题,可是我们却觉得他们最碍眼、最讨厌。如果不是他们,我们有可能在这世上吗?像这文章中的母亲,她为了不让幼小的儿子承受将来可能被朋友讥笑而将自己的眼睛捐给了他,可是不知情的儿子却以母亲为耻。

这,就是身为孩子该做的吗?

无论我们知不知道父母为了我们付出了些什么(其实并不重要),但是我们只要感恩他们、孝顺他们,就是最好的了。因为他们并不要求任何回报。好好的照顾自己,让自己和家人快乐、和睦共处就是让他们安心、欣慰的最好方式了。

^_^g